Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Pinkie's Up! Kids Birthday Party Etiquette


If there's one thing we absolutely love to do at M&M-- its kids birthday parties. Whether we're streaming daisy chains from chandeliers or rolling balloons in glitter, beautiful parties are just what we do. However, a wonderful party is more than just cute and clever decoration. Its about the experience you give to your guests, and the memories you are making for your children. It is an incredibly lucky thing to have loved ones gather to celebrate a birthday,and many kids go without year after year. It is so important to teach your children how to be gracious and appreciative of your efforts, and be thankful of the wonderful world they live in.

Birthdays have always been a huge deal in my family-- we have several traditions that, as a mom, I am committed to passing along to my own family. One of my favorite traditions is the cake, or cakes rather. My mom, without fail, makes me a special "birthday morning cake," every year. This cake is amazingly delicious, a simple, home made chocolate cake with nutella frosting and filling, and covered in sprinkles. I can't tell you how much fun it was going to school as a child and exclaiming that I had chocolate cake for breakfast :)

In today's birthday world, Pinterest crazed parents go to the ends of the earth to make the perfect party-- from hiring real ninja turtles to turning backyards into winter wonderlands and everything in between. This is wonderful-- children have so few birthdays to really make magical, and we believe every parent should make every effort to make the day special. However, there are a few guidelines that help keep children s' parties about the children, streamline complications, and inspire gratitude and good manners early on.

Here are some great guidelines to follow to throw the perfect party for your little one:

"If you're turning 4, thats 4 guests, plus the birthday kiddo."


  • A great rule of thumb is one guest for each year of your child's age, plus one. (we throw an extra candle on the cake right? This also helps to keep the strain of the day, attention, and over stimulation to a minimum on your child.

"Do not hand out invitations in public unless you are being totally inclusive." 

  • Not only does this help with the social pressures of inviting everyone (and going over budget) but keeping invitations private help to prevent hurt feelings at school/daycare. It's great to include a note about discretion in the invitation if you have a smaller guest list.

"The more adults, the merrier."

  • Having a ton of adult help at the party can truly be a blessing. Whether its wrangling a herd of preschoolers or being able to grab a volunteer for an ice run, you can never have too many helping hands at a kids party.

"Say hello at the door" 

  • Your young host or hostess should greet their guests as they arrive. This doesn't mean that they cannot engage in playing with their friends right off the bat, but it does mean calling your child away from the rest to say hello to each new friend. This helps the new guest feel welcome and helps your child to understand that every guest is important at their party. Hold off on any group activities until about 20-25 minutes into the party, or when the majority have shown up. They also should learn to say "thank you" and "goodbye."

"Have a game plan"

  • Plan plenty of activities, even if you wont get to all of them. Make sure that games leave everyone feeling like a winner, and be flexible in case your child would rather simply play with their friends instead.

"Soup's on!" 

  • Be clear about the food schedule (or lack thereof) so that guests and their parents can feel comfortable helping themselves to food throughout the party or waiting until everyone will be eating at once. For the younger folks, its important to have a more structured eating time in the party so that they don't feel like eating will be missing out on the fun.

"Oh goody, a goodie bag!"

  • Having goodie or treat bags is a fun birthday tradition, and something that all children look forward to. Keep in mind siblings (especially those who may be there when picking up guests) and include a treat bag for them if budget allows. A great way to incorporate more birthday love for less $$ is to make something yummy (ie sugar cookies, decorated in the party theme) and wrap them in individual bags, tied with fun ribbon.  

"So.many.gifts." 

  • It is truly a wonderful thing to have your child showered with birthday presents, but it is crucial that you teach them to be gracious and appreciative of every the time and money that others spent for them. If you do not want to open gifts in front of party goers (which is typically the most polite option, so that guests can see real-time joy and feel great when your child opens their present) make sure you are keeping a gift list as your child opens them later. Use the list to write thank you cards as soon as possible, even if you thanked the gift giver in person. If your child is too young to write on their own, incorporate them somehow so they understand the importance of a written thank you note. They can add drawings or stickers to the cards or envelopes, which doubles as a craft project. Yay!
Most important, enjoy the day and take a million pictures. Hug your kiddos and have fun at the party yourself. And, if you need some planning help, call on us! We're available! 


XOXO, M&M


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